


Zéphyros

by dachyk



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Age Progression, F/M, Hoshido-centric, I wrote this in June last year, Not Canon Compliant, Pre-game interpretation of how Aqua is treated by Hoshido, Use of Japanese names because this was before localization, so it's also sorta ooc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-21
Updated: 2016-01-21
Packaged: 2018-05-15 05:56:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5773906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dachyk/pseuds/dachyk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <b>Excerpt:</b>
</p><p>"It's your eyes that draw me in." She stares with an expression he's never seen before, and it frightens and amuses and mesmerizes him all at once. "It's always been your eyes. Every single time."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Zéphyros

**Author's Note:**

> crossposted from ff.net

She's from Nohr. Her attire is dark and clashes with her light hair. Her features are upturned and narrow. Eyes slit like a feline's, cheekbones high, lips thin—lips _chapped_ —ghastly skin covered in bruises.

She wears the Nohrian symbol. Even from the pillar he's hiding behind, he can see the crest clearly.

Suzukaze cannot hear what Ryouma is saying, but with the way the young lord is standing (rigid, mouth pursed, legs spread apart in a battle stance) and the way he fingers the Raijin in its sheath, Suzukaze takes it upon himself to leave. This is not his conversation. This is none of his business. His brother has every right to stand where he is, but Suzukaze is entitled to nothing.

He lingers for a second longer, in time for the Nohrian captive to raise her head. Her eyes meet his—she sees him, she _sees_ him—and some sort of desperation glistens, some sort of plea for help, for anything.

Amber is not meant to be hidden behind tears, but he turns his back to it and disappears.

* * *

The next time he sees her, she's in white. She's in white and blue and gold but no red, because she's _Nohrian_ and she shouldn't even _be_ here.

So he wonders why she is.

The clothes she wears are as exotic as her; they're tight-fitting and show off skin. Ribbons encase her being. Floral patterns spiral down her sleeves, her chest, her waist. They do nothing to hide her heritage though, because her features are still there, her eyes-

Her eyes are staring straight at him.

Her mouth opens before she gulps, and a smile flits past her lips as she draws nearer. Eyes are shining with recognition. Her eyes know who he is.

Suzukaze does what any fourteen-year old boy would do when faced with a situation he doesn't want to be in.

He runs.

* * *

Third time's the charm but it's also the last strike, and Suzukaze learns it the hard way when he first sees her dancing. She's light on her feet and her hair is flowing in ways he never imagined; they take a hold of his legs and will him to place, and he's trapped, trapped, trapped under her spell.

It breaks when he realizes she's staring at him. Right now, they're inches apart. Her head is tilted back and she's staring, those big, round, amber eyes of hers watching him with an innocence he can't deny.

He can't look away.

"My name is Aqua," she whispers, and he regrets not listening to her voice before. "What is yours?"

* * *

Aqua's name suits her, he thinks, because her hair is the colour of water, and she has this sort of affinity to the element. At least, that's what Suzukaze concludes when he sees her feet dangle in the pond, the ends of her dress soaked and beckoning lily pads to come closer.

Even though she is young, she looks like a goddess sent from the skies. It scares him. It scares him because she's from Nohr, and Nohrians aren't supposed to be this pretty.

They're as dark as their souls and as ugly as their hearts. Aqua can't be from Nohr. She isn't a monster, and she's anything but, so he imagines she's from the heavens instead. She is a godsend roaming the lands to grace peace wherever she goes.

The tranquility she washes upon him is something he can't get enough of.

Aqua spots him watching her and waves. Laughter bubbles in her throat as she says, "Suzukaze, come and join me."

She is like a siren.

* * *

She _is_ a siren.

He knows of no one who can sing as enchantingly as her. At fifteen, Suzukaze hears poems being sung with a voice that had bewitched him the first time he heard it. And again, again, it's bewitching him.

Aqua thinks she is alone, and Suzukaze slips past the trees to get closer to the blue-haired maiden. The words he hears strike him in the heart. He freezes in place—not in allurement this time, no—but because this talk of peace is unknown to him in a world full of war.

It's idealistic. Only a dreamer would think of such thoughts. But he supposes Aqua _is_ a dreamer, much like she is a siren, because those eyes of hers are the eyes of a child who has seen nothing. They are the eyes of a child who is a blank slate.

They snap open, like the branch Suzukaze just broke in half. For a fleeting moment, she looks at him with surprise before she smiles and walks towards him.

"Tell me when you're there. You don't have to hide," she tells Suzukaze.

"I didn't want to bother you," he mumbles.

Aqua laughs as if he made a joke. "You are my friend. Your presence won't bother me in the slightest."

He stares into her eyes and sees nothing but patience and love. They hold nothing but the happiness of a newborn babe, a feeling he doesn't know when he felt last.

* * *

"You know, you're different from the others."

Suzukaze blinks at her. Fish tickle his feet and he glances at the water. He sees his reflection and he sees Aqua's, and at this moment, that's all that matters in the world. "What?" he asks.

Aqua smiles. Enigmatic and mysterious, it enchants him. "You talk to me," she explains. "Why?"

"Do I need a reason to talk to someone? Is you being here not enough?"

Her eyes silently answer yes, it's not. But her lips say otherwise. "Thank you, Suzukaze. Thank you."

* * *

Everyone looks at her differently, because she is the _enemy_ , and they're concerned for _him_ because he's fraternizing with her. His brother talks to him one day with Kagerou in hand, and at sixteen, Suzukaze feels indignation for the first time in his life.

"This has gone on for long enough, Brother, and I can't stand for it any longer. You shouldn't be talking, not even standing near, to that woman!" Saizou says it so blatantly, like it's an obvious fact. "Her family took Lord Kamui and killed Lord Sumeragi! We can't trust her."

"Have you ever realized we took _her_ from her family? The same practice you, yourself, are damning?" Suzukaze hisses.

Kagerou jumps in when she sees Saizou's gaze narrow. "You do not know what you are talking about, Suzukaze. They killed one and kidnapped another. Can you still say they have done nothing wrong?"

" _She_ has done nothing. She cannot be responsible for crimes she did not do! You must listen to me, Aqua is-"

Saizou slaps him. Suzukaze spits out his own blood. "No, Brother," the older of the two growls. " _You_ listen to _me_. I will not have you speaking her name, nor will I have you betraying the Royal Family! Any more for this and it will be an act of treachery. You can be _killed_ for this crime!"

"Then why don't you? By your words alone, I should be dead by now. _Kill_ me, Brother. Why don't you do as you say?"

Kagerou has to restrain Saizou from touching him again. The blood they share boils in rage, anger blinding their actions, frustration slicing the air around them in harsh strokes. It takes a minute—a minute that stretches out longer than Suzukaze has ever known—before his older brother slumps his shoulders and looks away.

His face is lifeless. "You are my brother, Suzukaze," he says, tone resigned and defeated. "You are my brother, and I will not bear the punishment of killing one of my own upon myself."

His eyes meet Suzukaze's, and all they hold is fear. Saizou's mouth opens to say something, but he closes it and shakes his head before stalking away.

Kagerou is the one to translate his actions into words. "It's _because_ you are family that he can't bear to lose you." Her tone is clipped, curt, and it strikes a chord in Suzukaze's heart. "His body is with Lord Ryouma, but his soul is with you. Think about that the next time you decide to talk to her."

* * *

He doesn't.

He doesn't try talking to her again, doesn't even spare her a glance. He hides in the shadows and watches her (sing, dance, _breathe_ ), but he doesn't show himself. There's an ache in his chest when he sees she is still smiling, still laughing. It makes him realize something.

She doesn't need him. She never has and never did, not like how his brother needed him.

So instead he follows her around, always near but never close. He follows her around long enough to know she is always alone. No one dares to approach her. Only he has, only _he_ ever will.

But sometimes, when she stops and looks back over her shoulder, her eyes follow along the direction he's in. He has a feeling she knows, but she never bothers to check.

She may be lonely, yes, but she's never alone. His only regret is that he doesn't do anything about it.

* * *

Suzukaze dreams of her eyes sometimes, when he's sorry and frustrated and sad. They haunt him, mock him. They're jewelled stones that are hollow and _dull_ (why are they dull?), and it reminds him of the first time he saw her. Of how he had forsaken her, of how she was only a child, of how he had always thought she was _beautiful_.

Other times, he dreams of the peace she speaks so often about. Suzukaze lets himself be delusional during those nights, because those are the nights when he can pretend to hold her in his arms. He can touch her skin. Her hair. He can stop hiding in the wake of her footsteps and finally— _finally_ —be able to face her without having to face his cowardly self.

On both accounts, he always wakes up in cold sweat.

* * *

His brother may have forgiven him a long time ago, but Suzukaze can't forgive himself.

He can't forget, not when he sees her wading deep into the pond like she's about to _drown_. She sings of love and dreams and happiness, but she can't fool herself. He can see past those lies. He can see cracks in the walls she's building around her body; she wants someone to notice and tell her she's okay. That she'll never be lonely ever again. That she _matters_.

(it's as if he's telling that to himself. suzukaze has lost count to how many times he's called himself a hypocrite.)

* * *

For two years, he listens to her talk to herself. Not really—because she _knows_ he's there—but he's been pretending since he was sixteen, and so he can pretend once more.

"I've heard countless tales about people wanting to be birds," she says, "because birds...birds are unchained. Unbound. They are free to fly across the vast skies because it's their domain. They can go wherever they want, whenever they want. Birds travel forever, and some call that being alive."

Her gaze slips towards him. He pretends (oh how he pretends) not to notice. "I've come to a realization," she says in a quieter voice, "that humans like wanting things they cannot have."

They are quiet. It's well after sunset before Aqua stands and heads back home—if home is even the right place to call it.

Suzukaze doesn't follow her. No. Instead, he stays up all night to watch the stars and moon and dark bleed back into day.

* * *

He's nineteen when he's faced with the first important decision of his life. It's one of _those_ nights, nights when he can't go back to sleep because she's haunting him, haunting him, haunting him. In some sort of twisted fate, it's one of those nights for her too (for all completely different reasons, but he can't help but believe that _maybe_ ).

Suzukaze stops in his tracks. She does as well, but it doesn't take long before she starts to walk again. She's always taking the first step and it sickens him.

"Suzukaze." He shuts his eyes. Maybe _this_ is all a dream, because there's no way she would say his name in that _sweet_ and _gentle_ voice of hers, as if he had never wronged her at all. "Suzukaze, how are you? It's been a while."

A while, he thinks. _It's been a while_.

Aqua isn't deterred. "The night is beautiful, isn't it? I can see why you would take a walk, but it's quite late right now. You should be sleeping."

Suzukaze shakes his head, staring at the ground because he can't lift it any higher. She's barefoot. The ground digs deep into her feet, but her dress is as pristine as ever.

"Couldn't sleep," he croaks.

"Nightmare?"

"You could say so."

She smiles. He doesn't notice. "Come with me, Suzukaze," Aqua says.

He's afraid to ask. He's afraid to know. As much as he wants to say 'yes', there's something that pulls him back, something that makes him stay. He doesn't dare to lift his gaze because he's certain that just one look at her will break him down into tiny pieces, and his brother—no, _Hoshido_ —doesn't need tiny pieces.

"I can't," he whispers. "I can't. Aqua, I'm-"

(too weak, selfish, a coward-)

"-sorry."

"It's okay." She places a hand on his shoulder. He indulges in that, at the very least. "May you sleep well in the nights to come."

When he sees her at the pond the next day, dancing and singing as she's always been, Suzukaze feels both relief and disappointment in ways he can't even explain.

* * *

At nineteen, he also faces reality.

He is on the battlefield, slicing down enemy after enemy after enemy. For the Kingdom, for Hoshido, that's the motto that resonates in his ears. Suzukaze lives for that saying. He lives to uphold that promise.

So when he's face-to-face with a young boy, unarmed, scared, and _dying_ —he's easy prey, easy prey—why does he hesitate?

Suzukaze stares into the boy's eyes and sees despair. He sees terror. Where has he seen that expression before?

He's about to let him go (his chubby cheeks and short stature, Suzukaze thinks, can't make him any older than fifteen), but a flash of red comes and goes, and the young boy slumps to the ground like a ragdoll. He is unmoving. He is dead. Suzukaze's eyes widen.

He was only a boy. _He was only a boy._

Saizou hits his younger brother on the head. "Don't daze off, you idiot! That could get you killed someday, you know?" He sees Suzukaze's dull stare and concern instantly laces his words. "Hey, are you hurt? Did someone hurt you? Sakura! Lady Sakura, Suzukaze is-!"

The words are forced out from his mouth. "No, it's fine. I'm fine."

A growl. "You are not. Don't lie to me."

"I'm tired, Brother. Honest," Suzukaze says. "I'm just tired." Of everything, but it's not like he can say that out loud.

* * *

When another year bestows its gift of age, Suzukaze begins to wonder 'what if?' What if this war never happened? What if they all lived in peace? What if they didn't have to live in a world where the only reason you kept your eyes open was to know you were _alive_?

What if he had run away with her? How different would life be?

He stares into the pond and sees a reflection, one unlike the reflection he saw years ago. Now, he's looking at a man who has seen things he wishes he never had, who has lived a life he wishes he could throw away. He sees regret. He sees sorrow. He sees shame.

...He sees green.

Green.

He does not see Hoshido or his brother's reprimanding gaze. He does not see duty, nor does he see a sense of purpose. He does not see warring countries, not Nohr, not bloodshed.

All he sees is Suzukaze.

He sees himself.

* * *

The next time he sees her, she is in a flower field past the woods. Wildflowers are sewn together to make a wreath—no, a crown—and when she places it on her head, it reminds him all over again that she is only a child. She is not much older than the boy he saw his brother kill a year ago.

He does not hide this time. He walks forward until he's five feet away from her, and his shadow looms over her and makes her look up.

Her eyes do not contain the excitement that appears in them. They are a pair of dazzling amber that nearly blinds him on the spot.

"Suzukaze!" Aqua smiles, standing up with her flower crown as she nears him. His smiles back, but it doesn't quite reach the rest of his face. "How nice of you to join me. I've just finished making this-" She lifts the crown up. "-but I can make you another, if you wish."

"Flowers don't suit me, Aqua," he says.

She laughs. "Then you haven't been looking for the right ones."

She gently tugs on his hand and pulls him down with her. The scent of spring enters his nose every time he breathes, and Suzukaze closes his eyes to draw it all in. Aqua begins to hum a soft lullaby as she does her work. It's enough to make him sleep then and there.

It's nighttime when he wakes, and he wakes lying in a bed of flowers. Aqua is beside him, her eyelashes tickling her cheeks with her hand wrapped around his. On her head is a crown of flowers. Between them is another.

Suzukaze doesn't bother resisting it; he leans in and kisses her forehead, muttering a 'thank you' underneath his breath. She stirs for a moment but doesn't wake up, so he closes his eyes again.

He dreams of nothing; it's the best sleep he's had in a while.

* * *

He makes up for lost time by meeting her in their flower field. He's twenty, almost twenty-one, but when they're laughing together and making flower wreaths all for themselves, he feels like he's sixteen once more.

* * *

"Why do you talk to me?"

She doesn't look up as she asks, and Suzukaze doesn't tell her to. He simply picks flowers and dumps them into her lap. "I think I've already answered that question before, once upon a time," he tells her. "Do I really need a reason?"

Aqua smiles bitterly. "A reason would make me feel better, I think. I can hear what the others say about me. I'm not deaf."

"Well, neither are you _ignorant_." She frowns, and he feels as if he should stop talking, but the words run out of his mouth before he can stop them. "Why should I let the others dictate what it means to be a friend? Are you saying I can't talk to you either? Is this your way of telling me to leave you alone?"

"That's not it," she says, agitation evident on her face.

It's his turn to frown. "Then what do you mean?"

"Four years, Suzukaze," she whispers. He flinches. "For four years, you _let_ them dictate their definitions. You _chose_ to listen to their words. I can understand that, because anyone would have done the same." She shakes her head, shutting her eyes. "But four years and now this? I don't know if I can believe you again. I don't know if you'll stay this time."

He's scared. He's scared he's making the same mistakes all over again. "It's your eyes."

Aqua opens them.

"It's your eyes that draw me in." She stares with an expression he's never seen before, and it frightens and amuses and mesmerizes him all at once. "It's always been your eyes. Every single time. Don't you see? Whenever you...you _look_ at me like that, I just can't..."

When she leans in, he can smell the scent of violas and silenes. "You can't...?"

"I just can't leave you alone," he finishes lamely. "But I have to. I need to leave. I can never stay because I have to _go_ , and it's not fair to you and you don't deserve this-"

She presses a flower to his lips. "Have I ever told you why I like being around you?" He shakes his head and she giggles. "It's because you live up to your name."

"My name?"

"Yes, your name. You remind me of spring, Suzukaze. You are the gentle wind that cools hot temperatures and rustles everything awake. You are the sun that thaws the snow and breathes life back into the earth." She places a finished flower crown on his head before adding, "Did you know I love spring? It explains why I love you."

With one last smile, Aqua laughs at his dumbfounded expression. "Peace, my dear springtime," she says. "The way your face is frozen makes it seem like it's winter all over again."

* * *

It might as well be winter, because his heart becomes a desolate wasteland when he hears of Lord Ryouma's plan.

"We have waited long enough for this moment, brethren. Today, we will begin our march to take Kamui back!" he bellows, and amongst the crowd is cheers. Suzukaze can't feel his tongue, can't feel his _lips_ , like he's petrified in stone and glass.

He is chosen as one of the delegates—the connections his brother has are too miraculous—but he has to swallow down his hesitance and nod in assent.

When he seeks Aqua later on in the day, the words she tells Suzukaze do not comfort him in the slightest. "I have been chosen as well," she says, and he feels his heart chip even more and more and more.

* * *

He sees Lord Kamui for the first time in years, and the only thought he has is 'he looks well'.

He looks better than Suzukaze expects a prisoner to be treated—a Nohrian prisoner, for gods' sake—and his sword skill is much more exceptional than he remembers. Confusion rises like bile in his throat, and he wonders, just wonders, if-?

His suspicions are correct when Kamui chooses to side with Nohr. The Hoshidan family is in an uproar, and Suzukaze can't help but look for Aqua. He sees her, standing a few feet away with a lance in hand (a lance? she shouldn't fight. she shouldn't _need_ to fight), staring at Kamui as if she were about to attack him.

But he misunderstands; no, she doesn't attack Kamui. Amber does not waver and Aqua is the being that's preserved in it, calmly watching, carefully inspecting, for something he doesn't know.

* * *

It's no surprise that she comes to him late at night, steeled gaze sharp enough to cut him out of his tired state. They hide behind a canopy of trees like they're a pair of forbidden lovers—not that they are, but it's not like they _aren't_ , either—and Suzukaze makes his second most important decision at twenty-one.

"Come with me," she says. The night breeze envelops them in a soft slumber. "Suzukaze, please come with me."

The words are ever-so-familiar. When he closes his eyes, he thinks back to another night like this, when he was a coward, a weakling, a _fool_. No, he does not think of it any further. He opens his eyes and stares down at her.

And that's when he realizes it: Aqua thinks of peace and sees Kamui, for reasons he cannot explain. She sees the answer to all her questions, the answer to end all _this_.

When Suzukaze thinks of peace, he sees her.

He thinks of peace and sees a future with her in it, and it's clear to him what his decision is.

He whispers his final goodbyes in the wind and hopes his words will reach the others, because he is his own herald, and he is the zephyr that travels freely throughout the lands. He is unbound, free, unchained. He does not need to fly, does not need to dream, because Aqua does all that and _more_.

So "yes," he tells her, "I will come with you" and there are no more 'what if's for him to regret.

**Author's Note:**

> Yep, pretty OOC (especially Azura) and non-canon. But it makes me proud, so hopefully you guys like it as well.


End file.
